Random Desserts, Sands Expo and Convention Centre

Work Conferences: An Analysis

CONS:
1. Notwithstanding that there are lies, damn lies and then statistics and that I have absolutely no scientific basis for this factoid, I'd say that 80% of the population are terrible at public speaking and giving presentations. I'd also say that 20% of the population love the sound of their own voices. Furthermore, I'm pretty sure that the two segments aren't mutually exclusive, and you have a kind of Venn diagram cross-section of the overlapping segments which would be made up of THE MOST ANNOYING PEOPLE ON EARTH to give a presentation.

So first work conference con: You are BOUND, statistically, to endure at least some presentations by terrible public speakers, as well as terrible public speakers who ramble on at length and with no foreseeable end or point in sight, bypassing time limits, shrugging off schedules, continuing doggedly to just speak on... and on... and on.

I must have aged 5 years during one particular presentation by a CEO who blithely informed the audience that he was going to keep it short, and then went and did the exact opposite.

2. The rooms are always too cold.

3. The coffee is always watery and terrible, not that that stops me from drinking cupful after cupful to ward off soporofic effects of terrible public speakers.

4. I immediately tune out of a presentation after I see more than one exclamation mark or question mark in a row. If you have to "!!!" or "???" you sound more like an overzealous marketer or excitable teenaged girl than accomplished presentation speaker to whom I should be listening. Unfortunately this means I tune out of quite a few presentations.

PROS

1. It breaks the monotony of going to the office.

2. The knowledge gained. Theoretically, anyway. And by theoretically, I mean, as perceived by your bosses who sent you there.

3. The dessert bars at the buffets! Obviously, I saved the most important pro for last.

Cookies and Cream Cheesecake, Coffee Bean (Singapore)

Yet more compelling evidence to stack onto Singapore's side in the eternal rivalry that is Malaysia vs. Singapore, in addition to super efficient infrastructure (I am so jealous everytime I get on the Singapore MRT, because I deal on a daily basis with the giant brainfart of an idea that is the Malaysian LRT), impressively manicured landscapes (I realize I am totally weird for coveting this, but whenever there's green in Singapore it's cultivated, clipped, garden green, which really appeals to my Type A side, and is in stark contrast to Malaysia's more laissez faire attitude to gardening), significantly lower crime rates (my taxi driver who has not ventured into Malaysia for 20 years for fear of being carjacked reaffirmed this fact for me, and everyone knows taxi drivers are always right), totally and thoroughly masterplanned city (that I am also in awe of, as Singapore has now become like a real-life Sim City which I used to really like because I could play God and design entire cities; I tried to graduate to the Sims, but generally people are less easy to control than cities, and thus have lower appeal. Which now makes me wonder if I didn't really want to be God so much as a dictatorial town planner), and generally awesome robotic nature: cookies and cream cheesecake that I found in Coffee Bean in Singapore that, as far as I know, is NOT available in Malaysia.


It looks speckly and freckly and is not the most photogenic cake around, but in absence of Malaysian boyfriend I turned to Singaporean cake and eclairs and waffles. Yes, I am unfaithful and a fatty and much to my dismay suffer from separation anxiety upon being separated from said Malaysian boyfriend. Even more to my dismay, evidently I fill up that empty void in my heart with sugar.

Going back to KL tomorrow, thank goodness. Malaysia has one giant pro going for it that will keep it trumping Singapore every time: it's home and my life is there. Also this damn exchange rate is bleeding me dry.

Waffles & Ice Cream; Hartamas

Yes. So. Contrary to popular belief, or rather, the total radio silence MIA AWOL where the fuck did she go now, I did not die. (Unless you count being totally swamped with work as death, which I am inclined to do.) I just got lazy about it. And then lazier. And then even lazier. And the fact that my office network blocked blogspot did not counteract the laziness, and then before I knew it, I hadn't blogged in a year, and now I miss it.

So I have returned, dear loyal readership of two (my mom, and maybe my aunt: hello!), and as I have not been starving myself over the past year (I will now be grudgingly honest and say that is DEFINITELY not the case, and if you would like proof, please behold my increasing derriere; baby got back and IS back), and could not rid myself of the irritating habit of snapping pictures of my food before I devour it, I now have many many food pictures of which to post.

A lot has happened in a year, and I feel that I have grown in many aspects of my personality and have matured as a human being.

For example, I used to dislike waffles and ice cream, or at least used to deny that I liked it, but now I like it and have come out of the closet. This took much time and effort, as I had to grapple with the fact that I cannot and will not bite ice cream (you're supposed to lick it! Tongue not teeth! It's cold and melts, which means it is liquid!) and it is a difficult, trying task, attempting to get your mouth to bite the waffle but lick the ice cream. But I persevered, learned to mouth multitask, and now present to you a picture of my new friend, waffles and ice cream.

There are, of course, many other ways in which I have grown and matured, all of which are as remarkably important and terribly interesting as this one, but my blog wouldn't be my blog if I didn't veer wildly off topic and write rambling soliloquies about nothing in particular while pretending to write about food. Right?